Birds and the Bees Lesson #1: Where Babies Don't Come From

Please enjoy the first entry in what I am sure will be a series, to unfold over the coming six months. Warning: contains graphic, scientific and personal content.

So Jason informs me that he and Lucy were having a conversation about whether or not she will like Lemon (this is the name she has given Future Baby since I told her it was "about as big as a lemon").

Jason: "What if you don't like it? Can we put it back?"
Lucy: "NOOO, we can't put it back after it comes out."
Jason: "Why not?"
Lucy: "Because it won't go back in mom's butt."
Jason: "Oh."

Incredulous at the IMMATURITY of this conversation, I ask, "Did you tell her it's not coming out of my butt?!" Jason says, "No!" I say, "No?!" Jason says, "You tell her!"

So I do. Later that night, as I am tucking her into bed...
Me: "Lucy, you know the baby is not coming out of mom's butt, right?"
Lu: "That's where Alex told me it comes from."
Me: "Nope. Do you want to know where it will come from?"
Lu: "Uh huh."
Me: "My vagina."
Lu: "Oh."