36.5 Weeks: FAQ

Wow, how far along are you?
36 and a half weeks, thanks for asking. And I won’t probe about whether you meant “Wow, I am so happy for you” or “Wow, you’re huge” or “Wow, you’re STILL pregnant.”

How are you feeling?
At this point, honesty fails me. Let's just leave it at "GREAT!"

I bet you just can’t wait to be done with this heat, huh?

Do you know what you’re having?
A baby.

Well, do you have a feeling about what it is?
Either a baby or a really greasy burrito.

Is Lucy so excited?
Actually, we are trading Lucy in under the Cash for Kids program that allows you to replace one misbehaving child with a smaller one that knows fewer words. So she’s excited about going to live with her new family.

Yes, she’s excited.

Are you making any progress?
Oh, you mean am I effaced or dilated? According to the doctor, my cervix is thinning, but not dilated.

Thanks for your interest.