The End of the Affair

Every morning at 7:37, for as long as I can remember, we've heard the strains of the Elmo's World song. Lu will stand at attention: what will Elmo be doing today (besides speaking about himself in the third person)?!! He's always having fun! He's the star of his own segment that takes up one-third of the show! Elmo epitomizes both toddler interests (bicycles, families, fish, cats, hurricanes) and the toddler superego (deep emotion, short attention span, intense self-focus, absent parents). Elmo has been Lu's idol, her guru, her BOYFRIEND.

Except she broke up with him today. Maybe she did not break up with him today, but like any slowly declining relationship, today was the day of clarity. The day of "Oh, by dating other people, you people other than me."

Today, at 7:37, she said, "Turn this off. I wanna watch Dora." This, from a semi-sick child who would have previously used Elmo as a poultice on a wound if she could have.

Turn this off. The end. Goodbye. And don't let the door hit you on your furry red ass on the way out.