"Lucy, if you want to go bye-bye, you have to put pants on."
"Can you please help Daddy? Please let me put your pants on."
"Okay, then we'll stay here."
"NO, GO BYE BYE."
"Well, you have to help me put your pants on."
[Momentary quiet as pants go on]
"Okay, now we have to put your shoes on."
"NO BLACK SHOES. BIG GIRL SHOES."
"Those are sandals. It's too cold to wear sandals."
"BIG GIRL SHOES. BIG GIRLS SHOOOOOOOES."
"Do you need a timeout, Lucy?"
"Okay, sit in this chair."
"I'm a bad father."
[Muffled wailing. Banging on door.]
[Sandals being banged on door.]
[Alternate pleas for Mama, Daddy and Shoes.]
Fade to shot of defeated, snotty child wearing shoes, not sandals, accompanied by triumphant father, complimenting child on her lovely shoes.